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Page 93 of your Owner's Manual.

Yours is a better version of the mascot. Let me revise mine and use yours.

How about something like this (revised to used webby's mascot):

I've gotta say, this makes me wish I were a software programmer. This would be an excellent opportunity to make a great product plenty of people would want.

Yeah, I'm afraid to ask you what that avatar stands for...like maybe someone is going to hit me since I don't know.

Yeah, you're right. Drinking and driving is bad. Welcome spring!

Nope, I farted. Sorry about that.

SHOTGUN!

I'm embarrassed by having read that twice before it clicked.

We should put out a rubber-stopper deposit jar for anyone else who stops by the forum.

The Unknown Legend of All Time remains unknown.

Wow, what a complete surprise! Awesome Dad you have there. Welcome! Can I be adopted?

Cut a hole in the box

riiiight. We only need go to the store and pop some more.

My vocal reaction to seeing that tree of horrors.

Apple just made every other tablet in the market a dinosaur.

NOPENOPENOPENOPENOPE

Larger e-penis that they can swing around during middle-school.